Here at Mouth, we’re always divided about our favorite flicks of the year.
What we can agree on, however, are the must-have indie goodies needed to get us through the Academy Awards. Unlike the first Oscars in 1929, which lasted only 15 minutes, tonight’s broadcast will easily run longer than three hours. We’re going to need all the nourishment we can get!
So, without further ado, after much screening and reviewing, here are this year’s nominees and winners:
Best Supporting Snack: Because when hunger strikes, you can’t act alone.
And the Indie Oscar goes to… Sweet Corn Tortilla Chips! These aren’t your average chips, folks. They’re made with fresh corn that’s picked when the kernels are soft and sweet, which gives them an out-of-this-world, corn-on-the-cob flavor. They make whatever snack (or dip) they’re in a scene with look good, and no matter how small their part, they always steal the show.
Best Adapted Meat: The original was good, but this is even better.
And the Indie Oscar goes to… Three Cheers For Three Jerks! The big argument around here is which jerky in the Three Jerks series is best. Diehards swear it’s #1, the original. Others say it’s #2, for its unexpected twist of Filipino adobo and Mexican chipotle sauces. And some swear it’s #3, which delivers some heat with its just-spicy-enough Memphis BBQ dry rub. Well, this set includes all three, which makes it a winner in our book.
Best Mixing: In a cocktail, of course.
And the Indie Oscar goes to… Charred Grapefruit Tonic! Rumor has it there’s no one on set this tonic doesn’t jive with. Vodka? Of course. Tequila? Great chemistry. Soda water? Duh. It’s made with lemon and lime juice, cinchona bark (the source of quinine for tonic), fresh grapefruit and – what really puts it over the top – charred grapefruit skins. It’s not heavy handed – just a subtle backdrop that heightens every moment.
Best Sound: Crunch, chomp, munch, snap!
And the Indie Oscar goes to… Martin’s Handmade Pretzels! Like the sound of an explosion, that satisfying crunch amplifies the experience of devouring these Mouth-watering, salty pretzels. And anyone who thinks that all pretzels are created equal has never tasted these. Saveur Magazine agrees – they called them “perfect, the standard against which all pretzels should be judged.” Move over, Hans Zimmer.
Best Costume Design: Because “what they’re wearing” is still important.
And the Indie Oscar goes to… Solveig Gin! This drop-dead-gorgeous bottle of gin isn’t wearing Valentino, Prada or Chanel – no, that stunning white number with delicate gold detail is original couture from North Spirits. And, like other famous red carpet crushes (*cough cough JLaw*), what’s on the inside is as beautiful as what’s on the outside.
Best Picture: Okay, so this award goes to our cinematography team.
And the Indie Oscar goes to… Indie Rice Krispie Treats! The critics have spoken: These indie versions of everyone’s favorite childhood treats are cinematic yet candid, subtle yet stylized. Totally Mouth-watering. And they taste as good as they look! This original series is the whole package.
Lifetime Achievement: Our most popular collections ever.
And the Indie Oscar goes to… Chocolate-Covered Deliciousness! We’re obsessed with chocolate-covered goodies, and apparently so are the rest of you in the Academy. Yes, this is our best-seller, folks, but it’s not a sellout. With treats like chocolate-covered cheerios, pretzels and mini-peanut-butter-cookies, this is the Meryl Streep of gift bags – the hits keep comin’, and the quality is always there.
*music starts playing*
That’s our cue. See you at the after party.